Originally Posted by
steviewonder
You asked 4 it!:wink:
#1. Environment concerns: Security in where I was going to live and my surrounding area was the hardest thing for me as I was not sure what the dangers were here w/ the locals. Also I needed to get to know other gringos around me as I was told they would help with the ins and outs of your area. I was always on my guard at home and when traveling out and into areas that may not have a lot of gringos present. Over time I was able to get out around the country which made my days more interesting and at the same time very rewarding. As stated b4, unless you think you can go to the beach every day and live a co**** life while hitting Sosua at night, you will need a purpose for being here. Even with a job, you need to get involved in something besides hunting chicas down. Volunteering your time, gym, and planning a personal trip somewhere helped me. Like 2or3 times a week outside of Sosua while taking public transport is what I did in the first 3 months b4 getting a car. Just going to POP and walking the streets, or learn the bus system and head to Santiago and back in a full day will help in developing confidence in where you are and the people you meet. I didn't know Spanish and It was very easy to see that I would need to learn quickly especially if I wanted to deal with the locals. If you need to learn then you will find just getting by on the basics (CD’s) will get you a long way. Then the more you hook up with locals in some way then the easier you will develop your skills vs. in a class room w/ a group of gringos, trust me on that one. I hooked up w/ a chica that I enjoyed and paid her $ a month to work 2 or 3 times a week in helping w/ my Spanish, and it also improved the sex.LOL! I’ve maintained that you must develop the ability to live under the radar in most every situation while living here as gringo. Avoiding conflicts with Dominicans is a must, and at the same time learn to swallow your ego and harness your anger. Never think a Dominican will side with you as a gringo when there’s another Dominican involved in a dispute. If you want and can only live by flashing, then it’s your thing and your time, it’s not mine. What I learned living here is that this is a third world country where 90% of the entire working force earns less then US$200 a month. Then when you take a local gringo who is spending on avg. 7 times that amount in living here, why would I want to flash and bring attention to myself? I learned Dominicans are survivors and image is everything to them. They will spend the last peso they have on a salon or pair of jeans b4 they think about where they are going eat next. But to see the real environment I had to venture out in this country. There I found people who may have just the basics in life, however they would give you the last scoop of rice if they knew you needed it. One of many lessons I learned about the environment was one that no matter how long I or you would live here this is not our country. Also, I learned because you cannot change the way things are done here, learn not to sweat the small stuff. Also another lesson I learned quickly was most Dominicans aren’t concern in getting anything changed here either. As far as looking at things in a logical way, well I was best leaving that at the airport especially when you experience how some things are done here and the speed in which they are done.
#2 Local treatment: There’s not a one rule for this on how Dominicans will treat you and the timing of this change. However, what I have learned is this really depends on you and what type of personality you bring to their table. Also a lot will simply evolve over time as to where and when you encounter locals, and probably more importantly how you present yourself to them. From day 1 I never dressed like a tourist w/ a camera around his neck everywhere, or wore shorts and sandals at night outside of tourist areas as I knew the locals would look at me as a tourist. I was told at the beginning; If you treat the locals like lower class citizens similar to how they’re treated by the so called rich Dominicans here, then I would suggest you get to the airport as fast as you can and leave. It did help me, and at the same time amazed me how showing a little respect along with a smile went a long way with the locals. And I already knew that if I did was hang out on PC all day/night and then head into classicos, well then I wouldl only really have one type of connection w/ a local that I was living here. Also my sole judgment would be based on what the rate was, which I know would be harder to convince them to lower if they only saw me in Classicos all the time. So I would say, depending on how long you plan to live here will determine whether you’re able to encounter more Dominicans especially outside of Sosua, and how they treat you as well. I had and still do have a 6-8 yr plan to be here. So Sosua was used as a base for me, and not to be used as my only area to educate myself or hunting chicas down. Not to say it’s the right plan for most people, but it worked for me in that it offered me a lot of opportunities to meet Dominicans in places that Sosua would never be able to provide. However in Sosua I would only hang out in local gringo bars, make some friends in these places and move out to the country in order to meet some Dominicans, especially chicas that were not interested in Sosua. I would say within 2 months I started to experience the different reaction from locals and more importantly the confidence that I developed in being amongst the locals in places I knew I had to go to see the real DR. What I mean by this is when you’re in local bars, carwash, colmado, or restaurant outside of Sosua, Dominicans will generally look you over like they did me, but in most cases will not make you feel uncomfortable. You may find yourself thinking as I did as to what these Dominican where saying about me, or thinking like, why is he here? Then and only then you will learn how things are done here as well as basically improving your local senses. You’ll then start to notice that Dominicans don’t drink to get drunk, and in fact can take a ½ hr to finish off a grande. Chicas are not interested in you if you’re seen as a drunk unless you’re in Sosua where they have mastered “the money and run trick”. Be aware if you see a chica you like if other Dominicans are heavily checking her out as well in these local places. I made this mistake one too many times as you may want to rethink about stealing a local girl away from him. However, if you have established in the place you live here, or if the chica is very receptive then go 4 it. Never flash your tip to a local bar girl or waitress like you’ve got money to throwaway. I learned to place it in her palm w/ a smile either when I’m ready to leave, or if I buy a beer and get 5 pesos back. I’ve seen tourist buy a beer at 70 pesos, get 30 pesos back and give it to the girl. WTF, 40% tip and the girl doesn’t even smile and the guy doesn’t even get her number. Trust me while living here, throwing your money away in tips will never earn you any respect, it will only put you into the loco gringo class and not local gringo. These are just some of the Dominican customs that I mention because they were easy for me to see how the local do things, and at the same time made some of the differences in how you’re treated by locals. As far as Sosua, getting Dominicans to treat you differently will be based on who and how often you encounter them. If you go into say Playaro 2 to 4 times a week for one month, chances are very good most of the staff will know you’re living here. The same goes for banks, bars, beach vendors, where ever. Despite what people think about Dominican’s and their lack of education, they do have an amazing memory with names and faces, and I mean amazing. Just watch them play Dominoes and they can tell you every combination that’s been played.
#3 Gringo area: This really depends on you language skills and how confident you are in your environment. Yes it’s easier in the tourist areas to get started as I did not knowing any Spanish. But at some point I knew it would depend on what I wanted to get out of living here. The main advantage in the tourist areas is the services that are available and the ability of getting help if you need, i.e. medico, transportation system, friends w/ gringos, & others. The drawback is that you’re sometimes grouped w/ tourist gringos as the locals in this area can change almost daily. Even after 4 yrs. living here I still get approached by locals who think I’m a tourist. But also the upside is you can make some very good local contacts overtime that will support you as resident and provide you some very valuable information while living here.
#4 Chicas/Novias: The amount you dive into and the pace you go at it, really depends how important to you is quantity vs. quality and everything in between. What I have experienced is that the longer I’ve lived here the more I have changed as to how I look at these chicas, and the bullshit that comes w/ it. But the variety that one can obtain here will always outweigh the disadvantages. I guess you could ask yourself while living here; do I want to eat at the local favorite all you can eat buffet line and gain 30 pounds in the first 6 months? Or would I prefer to order from my favorite menu, and maybe have several desserts on the side? What is consistent here with some local gringos is yes they fuck other women while having a local novia. As you know being a tourist and will learn more by living here is it’s in your face and the availability is at every street corner. Then you add the payment factor most local gringos which are paying peanuts vs. what a tourist pays or nothing at all. I never wanted a novia when I first arrived as I was told it would tie me down with all the side issues that would come with being a local newbie. Well what happened to me was the opposite in what I planned for my first yr. However, I ‘m glad I didn’t listen to that advise as this stunner actually was one of the best things besides her pussy that happened to me. She ended up helping me get around this country and also spoke English and taught me a lot about the DR and the people in it. Now I was lucky to get a girl that had a very good job and saw Sosua as a cesspit which allowed me some freedom. However, I was not prepared what happened to me and what is very common here in what I call the jealous encounter from the third kind. Some guys I know have avoided this and after being here for awhile do have novias that have worked in Sosua. For the most part I think it’s easier to take the girl out of Sosua then it’s to take Sosua out of the girl. The other problem is when you dump a chica that works in Sosua, you will have a hell of a time avoiding her when going back into the city, as well as not knowing what she’s told her amigas about you. Then I know many more guys who enjoy the novia experiences only w/ girls from other parts i.e. STG/POP/SD and Badoo.com These relationships seem to work a little better, but can’t be compared to want normal is in other countries. The culture, education, and economical differences here will always be a facture in the vast majority of these girls, no matter how fucking good their pussy is. You will also experience as I have way too often when w/ a novia the “amigo factor”. This is the novia that tells you he’s only an amigo and we never had B4 or are having sex. These girls are no different than us guys, they’re masters at bending the truth, and more important to us they love to fuck. Now, there are many girls which you can meet that say work in a bank, office, or etc. and may be a bit different in how a relationship would develop. They’re in most cases living with their parents and may not be so eager to put out until they’re sure that you are only interested in a real relationship, and not an adventure. You’ll get asked like I have; how long you have lived here and how long will you be staying? They’ll also ask you about your family, back home and how you make your money. But don’t be fooled, these girls know the gringo sex scene and they will be a bit more suave in how and what they want from you, especially after they finally have given you their toto. I found that their families and amigas pressured them in getting pesos or things from me because I was seen as a rich gringo and that I should be paying in some way for the sex I was getting. But there are also ways to justify helping them and really at the end of that day you’re not really paying out a lot compared to back home, unless you get them pregnant.
Warning: These girls are the hardest ones to get rid of if you decide you want out.Especially when you consider how they or their amigas have been fucked up mentality by Dominican males over the sexual freedom that has existed here for many yrs. As for us gringos, we haven’t been here long enough to qualify in this class.
4 yr. residential report for the DR and for DMV……AMEN!