(especially about the "deaf, blind and crazy" part)
Seems to me that the roots of Society, as we've lived it up until the last half-century or so, are in Family ... in its tightest focus, on a man and a woman pairing up and committing to breed and raise children. This is the norm, because the two-parent family has been a very successful way of raising our young; I'm willing to argue that we've been genetically selected that way. An interesting point of that is that men, fathers, appear to have a stronger bond with their children than you see in any other species of mammal -- but maybe I, being childless, have no business speaking of that. But I certainly observe it.
Our species has also been described as a "herd animal." We tend to live in large groups, to classify ourselves by sub-groups, and to internalize and conform to the behavior we see around us ... especially what we see and live with in our childhood. And we are shaped by that -- the 'nurture' side of nature vs. nurture -- whether we conform to it in our adulthood, or rebel against it, or strive to overcome it and do better for ourselves.
But there are always outliers ... Okay, that's enough prologue.
I think people who do a lot of traveling are outliers. Even more so, people who do a lot of foreign travel, who need the fat passport. And I think people who will fly across an ocean for half a week of debauchery are DEFINITELY outliers -- Yes, I'm looking in the mirror!
I think it's the same with pair-bonding. Some folks stick to the norm, and succeed in that "happily ever after." Others make a go of it, but it doesn't last, for whatever reasons. Some of us ride the carousel, but don't manage to catch the ring; some of us are just enjoying the ride. There are a lot of folks just watching from the sidelines ... and a few of us who skip the carousel and head straight for the bumper-cars. (Boy-oh-boy, am I ever straining at these carnival analogies!)
We, as mongers, are way outside the norm, for whatever reasons. Some of us, further than others. I may be one of the "furthers," because I can't see myself settling down; I'm uncomfortable with letting a woman that far into my life. (The closest I've come to it, recently, ended badly.) I'm not looking for someone special or something lasting; I'm enjoying the thrill of the moment. But I'm still a tourist.
Will things change -- will I change -- when (if) I expat to my One Particular Harbor?
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