Irie
02-07-2014, 11:45 PM
I was fumbling around in the 'attic' of this site and came across a box that hasn't been opened in awhile. There was a treasure of info in it that many may find useful in their adventures. There are many new members (me included) since this was originally posted (2006) and it couldn't be more accurate in many aspects still today.
I thought about bumping the thread, but there are many posts and responses from members that are no longer active. I thought it might need a fresh start. Should you care to read, it can be found here......
http://news.insearchofchicas.org/forum/showthread.php?7935-A-guide-for-the-Nubie-this-appeared-in-my-quot-inbox-quot
Cudos to the original author and also to Jayman for posting it here.
Read and learn. Quality advice and insight being shared.
GFE (Girl Friend Experience) in the Dominican Republic.
You're here for a 1 or 2 week vacation or even living here you have
to get realistic about Dominican relationships. The reason most men
come down here is because of the beautiful chicas. The culture is a
little different and sex is a lot freer (but not as in free) but as a
point of view. The longer I'm here I realize how little I understand
about the Dominican lifestyles and morality when it comes to sex and
love. You have to come to the realization that sex is recreation (what
else can you do when you have no money); morality has no part in the
equation.
Typically, the girl who works in these tourist areas as a part time
prostitute is in her late teens or early twenties. She may be from the
surrounding area but quite frequently she may have come from another
part of the country. She may have previously worked in a "take out
bar" (bar/disco with a salida) that abound in the country that cater
to Dominican men but came to realize that she could make more money
from tourists. The Dominican men frequent the numerous cabanas that
you see all over the countryside with their girlfriend "du jour". The
majority of these women have one or more children by a Dominican male
but the vast majority of the time, the father has abandoned the family
and his fatherly duties and the woman is left the raise the children
herself. Generally, this responsibility is handed over to the chicas'
mother. This cycle frequently repeats itself generation over
generation. A young beautiful sexy companion here is not a problem.
The three most frequently ask questions/requests are:
1) I want to meet a nice deceit chica.
2) I want to meet a chica that speaks English.
3) I want to meet an educated chica who has a regular job.
1) A nice chica is one that works, even if it's in a "takeout"
bar/disco. She takes care of her children and asks you for nothing
extravagant. She'll give you a manicure and offer to wash you clothes
for nothing. If she has a place that she can cook she'll offer to cook
you a meal. That's not to say she doesn't expect you to give her money
as help for the food and rent, she does.
That's my definition of a nice chica, it's not where they work, how
much education they have or how much English they speak.
2) Stay away from Dominican men who speak English and haven't got a
real job here. These guys would rather con you, the tourist than work,
so don't put too much trust, or any for that matter, in them. Some of
these were criminals deported from US jails in the 90's.
This is off DR1 web site. In case anyone wants to know where all those
Dominican men learn to speak English. ******US returns 64
felons****** The United States returned 64 convicted criminals to the
Dominican Republic after having served their jail sentences. The
Listin Diario reported that the 64 were residents of New York,
Boston, Philadelphia, Brooklyn and New Jersey. They had all been
convicted of felonies and their return brings the total number of such
cases to 3,165 so far this year (October 2003).
Much the same can be said for the Dominican chicas that work in the
hotels or restaurants and can speak English, they routinely have 4 or
5 boyfriends that come down once a year but send money to them monthly
via Western Union. The real problem these chicas have is when two of
their boyfriends vacation in the Dominican Republic at the same time.
A common misconception:
A common misconception is that the majority of Dominican prostitutes
works in tourist areas and caters to tourists, when in fact this is
not the case. Some do but the majority of Dominican part time
prostitutes' clients are Dominican men. The men visit small discos
that litter the country and are filled with Dominican women working as
hostesses without pay. Sometimes, like immediately before Christmas,
you will find more girls than normal working in these establishments
in an effort to earn some quick money for the holidays. They will then
go back to their normal lives.
3) An educated chica that has a job in the bank or goes to school, and
lives at home with their middle class or well off family is generally
off limits for a tourist on vacation. Sure maybe my 28 year old son
with his Spanish when he was living here might be accepted into such a
family as her date/boyfriend.
But for sure the 40/50/60 year old "gringo" tourist that isn't needed
to provide support for the middle or upper class family won't be a
welcome guest or dinner date for their 25 year old daughter. (Remember
the movie "Guess who's coming for dinner".)
You may find a poor and educated beautiful chica working in a
department store and is over 30 that are looking for an older/mature
man to take care of her and her children. But they aren't found easily
and you have to speak some Spanish.
Forget requests for #'s 2 & 3, spend your time looking for #1, a nice
young passionate chica that works and cares for her children, BUT!
Keep in mind the following.
Take note of these truths:
1) Even the most Dominicanized gringo is going to be looked upon as an
outsider here, who potentially has money. There is no way to get
around this. Their world view is often very narrow - much of their
understanding of us comes from TV and other very stereotyped
viewpoints. Dominican families (and Dominicans in general) tend to be
very good about sharing resources - if someone gets sick or needs some
financial help, they will often scrape up money from very extended
parts of the family to try and pay the bill. Thus, a Dominican
girlfriend EXPECTS that you will have some extra money to share with
the family.
A Dominican girl will treat you like you are her boyfriend, hoping
that you will send money to her after you leave in order to help
support her family.
2) We love them because they are very passionate and child like, when
we leave for 4 months we expect them to sit and wait for our return.
Get real, they aren't and neither are we faithful to them. And as an
outsider don't expect anyone to tell you that the money you've just
given her went to pay the doctor for her Dominican boyfriend's broken
leg. She had told you she needed the money for her son who is sick. I
know because it happened to me (and I live here) a few months ago with
my "then" girlfriend. They do behave like 8/9 year old children in
that they want everything now and will tell you very transparent lies
in an attempt to get what they want.
3) Some men visiting the DR are not just looking to pay for sex but
are more interested in a long-term relationship. In these cases, a
chica will jump to fill the void. She will stay with him for the
duration of his vacation and convince him that she is not a prostitute
but has fallen in love with him. She will talk him into helping her
provide for her and her children. The tourist will generally return
home believing that he now has a faithful girlfriend waiting for him
to return. She will keep in contact with him via phone or e-mail and
he will periodically send her money to help her. He will tell her when
he is coming back for a visit and she will be waiting as if she loves
him. Of course, she will have several men of this nature thinking she
is their faithful girlfriend and will also be working as a prostitute
when not preoccupied with each of them.
4) Give them money to live on when you're away. Bad idea! Give them
money while you are here but if you give them a lot they will be
expected to share it with their family and even their Dominican
boyfriends.
A friend bought his "then" girlfriend in a little home and gave
her 76,000 pesos to provide her with 8000 pesos a month to live on and
3000 pesos for the watchman per month. Plus 10,000 pesos for her
birthday. This was supposed to last 6 months. He came back in three
months and all she had left in the bank was 2800 pesos and her brother
had also moved in to the house. She had previously lived on 3000 pesos
per month.
A Canadian man met a "nice" country chica; he married his
Dominican girlfriend who had a 3 year old daughter. He set her up in
an apartment, furnished it and sent $1000. cdn down every month to pay
the rent and other expenses. All was well as long as he just came down
for his two week vacations. He came back last November to stay the
winter. His wife told him he couldn't stay the winter; he had to leave
after two weeks. Her Dominican "live in" boyfriend would get up set if
he had to stay away any longer than two weeks. Needless to say the
marriage is over.
5) Do you think these 19 - 20 year olds are with us 50 - 60 year olds
for our good looks and charm? Again get real, they do like us because
we can make their lives better and we do treat them better than the
Dominican men but it's a business deal. They prefer Dominican men to
us (80% have steady Dominican boyfriends) because they are more
comfortable in their own cultural circle (communication, music and
dancing).
We get love (sex) and affection in return for our financial help and
that's the bottom line!
6) GFE (girl friend experience) sure, take them to the beach, out for
supper (don't expect them to like the food or have an exciting
conversation) and dancing but if you expect too much you'll only be
disappointed with your vacation/girlfriend experience.
Final notes:
There are a lot of available young, beautiful women in the DR. If
things start to go wrong with what was earlier the love of your life,
don't wait even for a minute, give them a little motoconcho money and
send them on their way.
There is always another chica around the corner.
I often reread this GFE write-up when I meet a new chica just to
remind myself of the pitfalls.
I thought about bumping the thread, but there are many posts and responses from members that are no longer active. I thought it might need a fresh start. Should you care to read, it can be found here......
http://news.insearchofchicas.org/forum/showthread.php?7935-A-guide-for-the-Nubie-this-appeared-in-my-quot-inbox-quot
Cudos to the original author and also to Jayman for posting it here.
Read and learn. Quality advice and insight being shared.
GFE (Girl Friend Experience) in the Dominican Republic.
You're here for a 1 or 2 week vacation or even living here you have
to get realistic about Dominican relationships. The reason most men
come down here is because of the beautiful chicas. The culture is a
little different and sex is a lot freer (but not as in free) but as a
point of view. The longer I'm here I realize how little I understand
about the Dominican lifestyles and morality when it comes to sex and
love. You have to come to the realization that sex is recreation (what
else can you do when you have no money); morality has no part in the
equation.
Typically, the girl who works in these tourist areas as a part time
prostitute is in her late teens or early twenties. She may be from the
surrounding area but quite frequently she may have come from another
part of the country. She may have previously worked in a "take out
bar" (bar/disco with a salida) that abound in the country that cater
to Dominican men but came to realize that she could make more money
from tourists. The Dominican men frequent the numerous cabanas that
you see all over the countryside with their girlfriend "du jour". The
majority of these women have one or more children by a Dominican male
but the vast majority of the time, the father has abandoned the family
and his fatherly duties and the woman is left the raise the children
herself. Generally, this responsibility is handed over to the chicas'
mother. This cycle frequently repeats itself generation over
generation. A young beautiful sexy companion here is not a problem.
The three most frequently ask questions/requests are:
1) I want to meet a nice deceit chica.
2) I want to meet a chica that speaks English.
3) I want to meet an educated chica who has a regular job.
1) A nice chica is one that works, even if it's in a "takeout"
bar/disco. She takes care of her children and asks you for nothing
extravagant. She'll give you a manicure and offer to wash you clothes
for nothing. If she has a place that she can cook she'll offer to cook
you a meal. That's not to say she doesn't expect you to give her money
as help for the food and rent, she does.
That's my definition of a nice chica, it's not where they work, how
much education they have or how much English they speak.
2) Stay away from Dominican men who speak English and haven't got a
real job here. These guys would rather con you, the tourist than work,
so don't put too much trust, or any for that matter, in them. Some of
these were criminals deported from US jails in the 90's.
This is off DR1 web site. In case anyone wants to know where all those
Dominican men learn to speak English. ******US returns 64
felons****** The United States returned 64 convicted criminals to the
Dominican Republic after having served their jail sentences. The
Listin Diario reported that the 64 were residents of New York,
Boston, Philadelphia, Brooklyn and New Jersey. They had all been
convicted of felonies and their return brings the total number of such
cases to 3,165 so far this year (October 2003).
Much the same can be said for the Dominican chicas that work in the
hotels or restaurants and can speak English, they routinely have 4 or
5 boyfriends that come down once a year but send money to them monthly
via Western Union. The real problem these chicas have is when two of
their boyfriends vacation in the Dominican Republic at the same time.
A common misconception:
A common misconception is that the majority of Dominican prostitutes
works in tourist areas and caters to tourists, when in fact this is
not the case. Some do but the majority of Dominican part time
prostitutes' clients are Dominican men. The men visit small discos
that litter the country and are filled with Dominican women working as
hostesses without pay. Sometimes, like immediately before Christmas,
you will find more girls than normal working in these establishments
in an effort to earn some quick money for the holidays. They will then
go back to their normal lives.
3) An educated chica that has a job in the bank or goes to school, and
lives at home with their middle class or well off family is generally
off limits for a tourist on vacation. Sure maybe my 28 year old son
with his Spanish when he was living here might be accepted into such a
family as her date/boyfriend.
But for sure the 40/50/60 year old "gringo" tourist that isn't needed
to provide support for the middle or upper class family won't be a
welcome guest or dinner date for their 25 year old daughter. (Remember
the movie "Guess who's coming for dinner".)
You may find a poor and educated beautiful chica working in a
department store and is over 30 that are looking for an older/mature
man to take care of her and her children. But they aren't found easily
and you have to speak some Spanish.
Forget requests for #'s 2 & 3, spend your time looking for #1, a nice
young passionate chica that works and cares for her children, BUT!
Keep in mind the following.
Take note of these truths:
1) Even the most Dominicanized gringo is going to be looked upon as an
outsider here, who potentially has money. There is no way to get
around this. Their world view is often very narrow - much of their
understanding of us comes from TV and other very stereotyped
viewpoints. Dominican families (and Dominicans in general) tend to be
very good about sharing resources - if someone gets sick or needs some
financial help, they will often scrape up money from very extended
parts of the family to try and pay the bill. Thus, a Dominican
girlfriend EXPECTS that you will have some extra money to share with
the family.
A Dominican girl will treat you like you are her boyfriend, hoping
that you will send money to her after you leave in order to help
support her family.
2) We love them because they are very passionate and child like, when
we leave for 4 months we expect them to sit and wait for our return.
Get real, they aren't and neither are we faithful to them. And as an
outsider don't expect anyone to tell you that the money you've just
given her went to pay the doctor for her Dominican boyfriend's broken
leg. She had told you she needed the money for her son who is sick. I
know because it happened to me (and I live here) a few months ago with
my "then" girlfriend. They do behave like 8/9 year old children in
that they want everything now and will tell you very transparent lies
in an attempt to get what they want.
3) Some men visiting the DR are not just looking to pay for sex but
are more interested in a long-term relationship. In these cases, a
chica will jump to fill the void. She will stay with him for the
duration of his vacation and convince him that she is not a prostitute
but has fallen in love with him. She will talk him into helping her
provide for her and her children. The tourist will generally return
home believing that he now has a faithful girlfriend waiting for him
to return. She will keep in contact with him via phone or e-mail and
he will periodically send her money to help her. He will tell her when
he is coming back for a visit and she will be waiting as if she loves
him. Of course, she will have several men of this nature thinking she
is their faithful girlfriend and will also be working as a prostitute
when not preoccupied with each of them.
4) Give them money to live on when you're away. Bad idea! Give them
money while you are here but if you give them a lot they will be
expected to share it with their family and even their Dominican
boyfriends.
A friend bought his "then" girlfriend in a little home and gave
her 76,000 pesos to provide her with 8000 pesos a month to live on and
3000 pesos for the watchman per month. Plus 10,000 pesos for her
birthday. This was supposed to last 6 months. He came back in three
months and all she had left in the bank was 2800 pesos and her brother
had also moved in to the house. She had previously lived on 3000 pesos
per month.
A Canadian man met a "nice" country chica; he married his
Dominican girlfriend who had a 3 year old daughter. He set her up in
an apartment, furnished it and sent $1000. cdn down every month to pay
the rent and other expenses. All was well as long as he just came down
for his two week vacations. He came back last November to stay the
winter. His wife told him he couldn't stay the winter; he had to leave
after two weeks. Her Dominican "live in" boyfriend would get up set if
he had to stay away any longer than two weeks. Needless to say the
marriage is over.
5) Do you think these 19 - 20 year olds are with us 50 - 60 year olds
for our good looks and charm? Again get real, they do like us because
we can make their lives better and we do treat them better than the
Dominican men but it's a business deal. They prefer Dominican men to
us (80% have steady Dominican boyfriends) because they are more
comfortable in their own cultural circle (communication, music and
dancing).
We get love (sex) and affection in return for our financial help and
that's the bottom line!
6) GFE (girl friend experience) sure, take them to the beach, out for
supper (don't expect them to like the food or have an exciting
conversation) and dancing but if you expect too much you'll only be
disappointed with your vacation/girlfriend experience.
Final notes:
There are a lot of available young, beautiful women in the DR. If
things start to go wrong with what was earlier the love of your life,
don't wait even for a minute, give them a little motoconcho money and
send them on their way.
There is always another chica around the corner.
I often reread this GFE write-up when I meet a new chica just to
remind myself of the pitfalls.